I have come to love full circle moments. They are a cleaning up of sorts, a karmic completion an ending to a story. Full circle moments usually begin with a significant life experience and generally end with a quieter and almost mundane quality. Full circle moments tend to sneak up on me when I least expect them. I had a full circle moment the other day.
One of the newer horses at my ranch needed to be seen by her vet. So the owner made an appointment for the vet to come out. The owner could not be here for the appointment so I offered to stand in for her. The owner informed me of the time the vet would be here and then she mentioned the vet’s name.
I lost my breath for a moment when I heard clearly who it was that was coming here. I had met him some years ago during a very traumatic and tragic experience. I instantly understood that our coming together again on this day would be our opportunity to complete things: to come full circle.
That experience with him years ago left an indelible mark on my being and my soul. It was a turning point for me personally. It was a situation where intuitively I knew the outcome of the experience if a certain route was taken. For much of my life I had been somewhat uncomfortable sharing intuitive information with people. Sharing intuitive information would sometimes leave me feeling responsible if they didn’t go the route I had seen. Sometimes I would feel embarrassed about what I had just shared but most often I just felt like they thought I was crazy since the information came from intuition and not proof.
Several days prior to meeting the vet for the first time I shared the intuitive information I had with the owner about the horse’s condition and the safest route to be taken in dealing with it. The owner of the horse shared that information with the vet. The vet insisted that the route he believed to be correct was the route I had seen as deadly for the horse. The vet and owner decided to follow the route he prescribed. Sadly the outcome of the appointment on that day was as I had seen. The horse did not survive the appointment.
I felt so many emotions about what had occurred. To some degree I felt responsible because there was a small part of me that thought I should have just put my foot down and said I won’t allow that appointment to occur here at my ranch. I knew at the time that was the wrong thing to do so I didn’t do it and to this day I know in my heart it was the right choice. After the horses tragic end, I spent days, weeks and months processing what had happened. I came to the only conclusion there could be for me – that it had all worked out how it was supposed to for every being who participated in the experience. The horse, the owner, the vet and myself. There are no wrong turns or accidents in life, just choices of which path you will choose on any given day. All paths lead to the lessons that need to be learned.
On that tragic day I learned that I can not be responsible for other people’s paths and I can not hold myself responsible for anything more than sharing the information that is given to me. What the recipient of that information chooses to do with it is up to them. People learn in the way that works for them. Some need it to be a very physical experience with many outside forces coming in too influence the path and guide the learner to the lesson and others prefer to learn in a less physical manner by following the intuitive path requiring large amounts of faith and courage up front with few outside forces coming in to guide the path. That day was a grouping of both, intuitive learners and physical learners. To judge someone else’s learning process is pointless & damaging to all.
Fast forward to the present day. The vet arrived exactly on time to see my client’s horse. As I approached his truck he held out his hand and introduced himself. I smiled and said we’ve met before. He looked away from me and then said yes, we met on a very tragic day. I agreed with him, our eyes met for just a second and then headed off to the see the horse. As we passed by the barn, he looked toward it and said that’s the stall where it happened. I nodded in silent agreement.
As we continued our walk to the horse that was to be seen on this day, we crossed the ranches bridge in silence, which felt like quite a metaphor at the time – Crossing over to complete something. As he examined the horse I wondered to myself if we would talk about what happened here on that day so many years ago. As I watched him work and listened to him speak I realized that this was as far as it would go for he and I. While we as humans & souls are working on the same issues, the vet and I had clearly chosen to work on them via different paths.
My preferred path for learning is more intuitive than physical and his preferred path for learning is more physical than intuitive. Both viable path choices and both work in the end. As we completed our appointment with the horse I could feel that we had completed our involvement with one and other.
I saw him as a fellow human and soul just doing his best to do his work and learn his lessons. I walked away feeling nothing but compassion and completion.
Over the years I have thought of that day, the horse, the owner, the vet, and the people who tried to help. The loss and pain suffered on that tragic day have helped me and many other horses since. I am more able than ever to share what needs to be shared and then to stand back and not feel overly responsible or insecure with how the other players need to learn. I am truly grateful for the gifts of that experience and the opportunity to complete the circle.